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Monday, October 13, 2008

Ministerial Kite Surfing

Dear Ivor

Are you still sulking after Thursday evening at the Bull? I can only apologise again for the demolition of the soapbox, how was I to know that the combined weight of myself and the antipodean barmaid would be a tad over the top, and at the time we did seriously believe that our rendition of “I will survive” would prove attractive to the female voters. However I must admit that we may have misjudged our audience at the time. Still, we knew it would be a learning curve, and I must point out that it was you that had initially engaged Kylie in discussion, no doubt influenced by her complimentary comment on, how did she say it, your vintage attire? Anyway promising her the position of Minister for Immigration was probably a little over the top, however perhaps Culture Media and Sport would suit her better as she could certainly hit those high notes and knew quite a bit about the Australian rugby team, some I believe from personal experience. She was also quite smitten with your idea of the campervan as our campaign bus, although her idea of ministerial kite surfing at Milford Haven, although quite attractive at the time, is probably a non-starter. However I have always had a romantic hankering for touring in a VW, so let’s look into the possibilities. The idea of the use of your shed in the meantime, although extremely convenient for our cabinet meetings, will require a little renovation and possibly the removal of your rugby memorabilia, much of which I think was obtained without the owner’s permission! Am however with you on the scaling down of the number of cabinet ministers quite substantially to fit! Did you finalise your list?
As to foreign travel, Robin has quite a few air miles which he could probably be persuaded to relinquish for the greater good, although your initial idea of a tour of Belgium breweries, presenting us with an opportunity to engage with the European community is probably a little tenuous and no doubt influenced by the pint of Westvleteren trappist ale you had just consumed. Venice for my part is quite an attractive prospect and one I think we should pursue. With regard to having a clear vision, I know you think that my manifesto point of “drugs for all” was a little misguided but I tried to explain that I did mean licensed ones only and I was not advocating the establishment of a general hallucinogenic state. It’s just that the amount of time and money spent contesting who can have what and in which areas by this committee and that sub-committee would be better spent on the drugs themselves. However I do appreciate that I may have to work on the wording. Have added this to my to-do list! Am sure we can iron out any creases at The Claptrap on Wednesday at 6:30, probably best to leave a bit of an interval before we return to the Bull?

Poll xx

PS Nearly forgot, how did the trip to Bekonscot Model Railway go and the beardless look is definitely you, took me back quite a few years!

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